I tapped the wood of the table, peering into the grain of the old oak. I was avoiding their eyes. I didn’t want to talk to them, but they wanted to talk to me. It wasn’t their fault. They couldn’t know what I’d been through. No one could.
Then Glasses reached into his coat, and pulled out something. It was wrapped in velvet, and he held it carefully, like it was the most precious thing he owned. As he unwrapped it, I caught a glimpse of wood and the smell of ash. He placed it on the table.
It used to be a small figurine of a salamander.
THE Salamander.
Now, it was missing its face and tail, and in the place they’d been I could see flakes of ash. Even as I watched, the figure degraded before my eyes. I looked away, returning to my contemplation of the dinnerware. Mom’s hand was on my shoulder, reminding me that she was there if I needed her.
“Do you remember this, Jim?” The man’s voice was smooth, but there was a hesitant feel to it. He was taking a risk, showing it to me.
“I was there,” I said. I readjusted in my seat. “I lived there for more than half of my life. And if you’ve been there too, then you’d know why I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I know,” he assured me, “that this isn’t something that is easy to talk about. All three of us used to live in Lostling’s Hope, before it was overrun.”
“Overrun? How is that possible?” The question came out fast, before I could stop myself. “It was well protected! Nothing from the Forest could – “ I looked up, finally meeting the man’s gaze. There were tears in his eyes.
He took off his glasses, cleaning them, breaking eye contact. After a few minutes, he put them on and looked back at me. “Most things couldn’t. What attacked us was different. Bigger, stranger, crueler than anything else we’d seen. It took both of our parents. It took Lostlings’ Hope and pulled it back into the Forest. We,” and he motioned around him at his companions, “Are trying to return to the Dark Forest. We think we know how to stop it, and prevent what happened to you from happening to anyone else. To do that we need you,” and his gaze returned to me, “To tell us how you got there in the first place, and how you got out.”
“And you think that will help?”
Both of the other two nodded. Glasses looked at them and shifted uncomfortably. “So… Can you tell us about…” and he nodded at the decaying sculpture, which had left a small ring of ash on mom’s table.
I stared at it for what felt like an hour before coming to a decision. “Alright. I’ll tell you.”
I had been lost for only a couple of minutes. I remember calling for help. I kept thinking to myself “Mom must be nearby. She’ll find me soon.” And then, that thing jumped out at me. I could barely see it in the dark, but I remember its big yellow eyes. They were strange, like goats eyes, and they lit up the rest of its face with a nightmarish glow. It was human, but I could see the silhouettes of goat horns. And it was talking to itself.
Despite my fear, I managed to squeak out, “Can you help me? I’m scared!” I’m still not sure why I decided to address it.
It turned to face me, those eyes like lanterns in the dark. The monster took a step towards me, saying “You heard me?”
“What?” I was confused at the time. “You were talking right? Are you going to hurt me?”
It wouldn’t stop staring. I felt like its eyes were digging into me, and they wouldn’t blink. They weren’t human - weren’t natural.
After a long pause it finally responded. “No… I need to keep you safe.” And then it roared and lunged at me.
The contradiction of actions and words was almost enough to keep me put, but fear is a wonderful motivator to stay alive. My body moved without my permission and the next thing I knew I was running. I could hear it behind me, breathing hard. I tripped and scrambled underneath a tree branch, just in time to avoid the horned monster’s headbutt. It shouted out, but I had managed to regain my feet. It yelled at me, screaming with a voice that could not have come from a human throat. Up ahead of me I saw lights, and I prayed that they weren’t the eyes of another monster. I ran as fast as my legs could carry me, and suddenly broke out into a broad stream. I slipped on a rock and immediately fell in. Something hit my head and I blacked out.
I woke up to a friendly man’s face. It took me a second to realize that I could actually see. The face broke into a relieved smile. He looked behind him. “He’s alive! The boy´s actually alive!” The man turned back to me. “Are you alright? How do you feel?”
I reached up to my head, gently touching the goose-egg that had formed on the back. Tears immediately formed in my eyes from the pain. Seeing my savior’s worried look, I tried to stay strong, just like mom had taught me. “I’ll be fine. It doesn’t hurt at all.” I gave a wobbly smile to the man.
He hugged me, and his relief washed over me along with a wave of exceptionally bad BO. He hadn’t had a chance to bathe in a long time. Eventually he released me. “I’m so glad. Can you walk? We need to get back to Lostlings’ Hope. You’ll be safe there.”
“What about mommy? When can I see her again?” As the questions came out, I immediately saw the man’s face harden.
“Well see. We need to get you to safety first,” he said, pulling me to my feet. “Lostlings’ hope shouldn’t be too far. And stay in the light. They don’t like that.”
“The light?” I asked.
He pressed a large glowing rock into my hands, about the size of a baseball.. “If you see monsters, break off a chunk of this and throw it at them. It should scare them away. DO NOT lose it. Do you understand?”
I nodded silently.
He nodded back and turned around to the other man next to him, who was carrying a large basket filled with the glowing rocks.
“Let’s head back. We need to get him to safety.”
I swiftly moved through the undergrowth, following the calls for help. My hooves thrashed through the ferns, leaving markings that some might mistake as those of a deer. They were going to die without my help. They might even die with my help, or in the worst case - through me, but I still had to try. I only hoped that this time I found the human before the Forest’s residents did.
I tripped on a pebble and almost overbalanced over a fallen branch, but grabbed onto another to steady myself. “No! I will not let this chance pass! Every other time the Forest found them first. This time I’m faster! I can save them.”
You know they won’t trust you.
“That doesn’t matter! Without them, I can’t get to the Campgrounds! I can’t be heard!” My voice cracked. I felt my heart bumping in my chest, against my ribs, rushing blood through my body so fast I could hear it echo in my ears.
And you’re still concerned about that?
“That's all that matters!”
Why does it matter?
“Because if I can’t be heard, I can’t be real!”
A terrified voice broke into my conversation. “Who’s there? Can you help me? I’m scared!” The words were half-spoken, half sobbed. It was the first time I’d heard one of them actually speak.
I stopped running, realizing I’d stepped into the sight of the small thing. It was wearing a shiny green jacket and was about as tall as my navel. It was also shaking. Badly. Terrified of being alone ...or even more terrified of not being alone.
Terrified of going unheard?
I stared at the youngling, hands clenching. It had heard me. It was asking me questions. What did I say?
“You heard me?” My voice came out shakily, resembling the child's state.
Of course he did.
“What?” The human looked at me, fear visible on his face. “You were talking right? Are you going to hurt me?”
Well Zephnos? Are you going to hurt it?
“No. I need to keep you safe.” I relaxed my hands. And that’s when the Dark Forest intruded.
My mind was ripped open once again and a foreign presence forced its way into my body. With my hands raised I charged towards the child - head down, ram horns facing him.
“RUN!” I managed to belt out the words before I reached him. I shut my eyes tight, hoping against hope that I could deprive the Forest of sight. I lept towards him, head down, hands reaching forward.
And amazingly, I missed him. My neck jarred as my head took an impact its cervical vertebrae were never designed for. I looked up in time to see the kid running into the Forest, away from me. I slammed down against the Dark Forest, but it was like trying to attack a kraken with a harpoon: Brave, but ultimately ineffective. I don’t think it even noticed me. Instead, I was forced to watch as my body ran after the child. Without any control over the situation, my eyes diverted from the chase and I caught glimpses of the fast bypassing landscape. My victim was running towards a light! I mentally cheered for him, even though I was pretty sure that my body could easily outrun a child this young before they got to safety. And that’s when I noticed I could feel my hands again. I reached out and wrapped my fingers around a branch as we were passing by. My pursuit jerked to a halt as I plowed horns-first into the dirt, giving the boy just a little more time to escape. Don’t look back! Don’t look at me! You’ll be able to leave if you don’t! But it was a vain hope. Of course the sound of my body slumping into the ground would get him to look back.
My body righted itself, and I once again lost control of my hands. It was strange. The other mind filled my body, but not completely. It was wearing it like an ill-fitting outfit. It gave up control of individual parts as it stopped paying attention to them, and I was able to seize control once more. At first the entity didn’t pay attention to my attempts to stop it, but after it failed to get up a third time, it smashed me into a corner of my own mind and placed a mental wall to stop me from interfering. Clearly I was beginning to annoy it. I tested the wall, but found it slippery. I couldn’t think about it long enough to break through - it kept escaping my grasp like a slimy fish.
The boy had managed to make it to the light, but as we followed him I discovered it wasn’t the Campgrounds’ light at all. The color was wrong, and it didn’t flicker like a firelight. Instead, it was a constant blue glow. I saw the boy run to it, then he slipped and cracked his head. Water! He had run into a stream of water, and that’s where the glow was coming from. He was swiftly swept down-stream, and I could feel the seething from the Dark Forest as it lamented the loss of its victim. It took a step into the water, trying to follow, and then it paused. There was a nervousness rising inside me that confused me. It was… it was scared of the glowing stone underneath the water. There was something about it that pushed away the demon in my head, and I could feel it retreating back to where it came. As it went, the wall blocking my control scrambled, and I could feel its tendrils leaving my limbs.
And then I was alone, my mind still reeling from the total violation of my will. I reached down, grabbing one of the stones. The moment my hand touched the crystal, an icy stillness spread out, and I felt my heart begin to flicker. I dropped it immediately. “Youch! What is that thing?” I stared at it under the water, but made no further move to touch it. And waited for my paradoxical knowledge to kick in.
And waited.
And waited some more.
Nothing happened.
And what are you expecting?
“I need to know what it is.” I stared at the stone. I had nothing to hold it in, so for now I’d have to leave it, but if it could hurt other dark forest denizens, and even the Dark Forest itself… I needed to know.
I looked down the river. I saw no sign of the kid, but that wasn’t surprising. The Forest had already shifted, and that river now led somewhere else. It wouldn’t do me any good to follow it.
I would have to begin again.
“What do I do now? My home is ruined.”
You were never really home. You merely borrowed it.
“I can’t stop myself from attacking humans.”
That was inevitable.
“And the only possible fix for that is a rock that I don’t know how to find and can’t even pick up.”
It will kill you to do so.
I leaned back against the tree, folding my arms while I watched the stream.
“Can I move it with magic?”
Why don’t you try?
I paused, considering.
“Recalcitrant stone,
Light brightly shone,
Come with…”
My voice died midway through a line. The Dark Forest was there again, watching me. It resisted my words, and this time its full attention was there, holding the fabric of reality in place. It was refusing to allow me to be heard.
“So that’s how it is.”
You were the one who made it notice you after all. It can’t hurt you, but that doesn’t mean it’s forgotten, or forgiven.
“And apparently can’t hurt doesn’t mean my body is off-limits. How am I going to get home without magic?”
How did you find your home in the first place?
“The old fashioned way. I walked.” I sighed, and pushed off of the tree. “I guess I’d better start.” And with that, I closed my eyes.
And opened them in the Ant’s Scrapheap.